Every parent wants a child that is well mannered and respectful, and you can ask just about anyone and get vastly different opinions on how to raise a good kid. The subject is surrounded by a lot of controversy, especially with disciplinary manners like spanking, and what is considered acceptable and what not. Fortunately, raising a good, obedient child is not difficult, and the concept of keeping your kid from acting like a hyperactive monkey out in public is one that appeals to most parents. – So here we’re going to talk about some basic principles for raising a child that not only is obedient, but respects you as well.
One of the very biggest issues in raising a child is trust. You might be surprised to learn that most children don’t trust their parents. – And no, I don’t mean this in a “physical harm” way. Most parents let their children get away with far too much, and they do not follow up on the things they say they are going to do. How often do you see a stressed out mother telling her child in the store that if he doesn’t put the treat back upon the shelf that he will get a spanking, and when the child defiantly refuses, she merely snatches the toy away and puts it back for him? This is one of the easiest and most common mistakes parents make. You must always do whatever it is you say you will. If you threaten to take away a child’s TV privileges for doing something, and they still do it, you must follow up on it every single time.
You have to understand that every time you don’t follow up on a threat or promise you make, your child is losing trust and respect in you. From a child’s point of view, all they are seeing is that you are claiming you’ll do one thing, and end up doing something completely and totally different. This leads the child to believe that your word cannot be trusted, and that their chances of getting away with things are much higher. Following up on everything you say that you will can be extremely difficult, but it’s of the highest importance. – Failing even once in doing so will lead your child to believe that there is a chance that they can get away with more. If you always make sure to stick with your word, your child will know that he can trust it, and respect you.
Another big parenting issue is embarrassment in public. Numerous parents allow their child to get away with being obnoxious in public because they feel it’d be far more humiliating to punish the child in front of strangers. This is another huge no-no. Of course disciplining your kid in public can be quite embarrassing, but it will ensure that your child will think twice before he acts up again. – In fact, it is much more embarrassing to allow your child to be the one walking all over you.
Here’s the deal: Many parents feel like their children are simply going to misbehave in public regardless of their actions. Therefore, if they start to punish the child, they will simply have to do so over and over again when it is easier to just let the child throw a fit. That, however, is a false notion. If you come down on a child the very first time they ever openly act up in public, the chances that they will do so again are drastically reduced. If they do so a second time, making sure that you respond just like you did the first will probably ensure that your child will hardly ever throw a massive fit again, and that if they do minor things to act up, it can be quelled long before it reaches a full-fledged tantrum. So here is the question you need to ask yourself: Do you want your child to act up for years, or just a few times?
The very worst thing you can do for your child is to let them misbehave without retribution. This is telling them that they can act however they desire without finding negative consequences, and is a lesson that you do not want them growing up with. It may seem like stern punishment is cruel, but in fact, ignoring the problem shows much less care and concern for your child. Make sure you always back up whatever threats you make and you’ll notice that not only is your child much better behaved but also, communication between you will be better.